Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Love Dare - Day 10: Love Is Unconditional

OK ladies and gents, this is where the rubber hits the road. You are a quarter of the way through this dare. So, tell me, do you see your spouse any different than you did when you began? I know I do. I see myself differently too, and that is pretty surprising.

I knew going into this that we have a strong marriage, but I can see it becoming even stronger. We have been able to talk about a few things that were on our hearts and that is HUGE. I am so thankful for the people that made this movie (Fire Proof) and this book. I pray that your marriage is benefiting as well.

Now, I said in the beginning that the marriage has to be about more than just the husband and the wife, that if the love is going to be true, you have to bring God into the fold. And today is where we will begin to really get into that...

"God demonstrates His own love toward us in this, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us" - Romans 5:8

If I were to ask you why you love your spouse, what would you say? Would you give me a list of qualities that they possess? Possible Handsome, beautiful, kind, wise, steady or generous? Now, what if, through the years, those qualities were to change? Would you still love him/her? How would you answer me then?

Love comes in three forms. First there is PHILEO love. This is a friendship kind of love. It is when you have enough in common with a person to feel a strong bond that becomes love. Very important in a marriage, but not enough to make it last.

Secondly, there is EROS love. This is a sexual love. It is when you are sexually attracted to the other person and that attractiveness deepens your feelings for him or her. Also, as I am sure you would agree, very important in a marriage. Yet, it is still - even when combined with the phileo love - not enough to sustain a lasting marriage.

Thirdly, there is AGAPE love. And this is the love that lasts. This is the love that God has for us. He does not love us because we are lovable, but because HE is loving. It is not for anything that we do, but because of everything that He is. He loves us unconditionally, no matter what, without fail and without end. And in a strong, Bible based, God centered marriage, it is the love we are called to have for our spouse.

This is what you meant when you said "for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, til death do us part". And this is where a marriage can either thrive or dwindle, or even fail.

And this is where today's challenge begins ...

Today's Dare

Do something out of the ordinary for your spouse today - something that proves to you (and to them) that your love is based on your choice and nothing else. Wash her car. Clean the kitchen. Buy (or make) his favorite dessert. Fold the laundry. Demonstrate love for them for the sheer joy of being their partner in marriage.

Remember, the dare is to make this not about you, but them. Not about anything that makes them lovable, but all bout what makes you love. Period.

Good luck and I will see ya tomorrow!

1 of ya left some love:

Kelly said...

Ok, so yesterday I cleaned out the garage for Mike. Even hiked bikes, strollers and painting equiptment up the attic ladder. Then I scrubbed the floor with bleach. I was a little afraid he wouldn't notice, but he did and complimented me on it. But, today the dog got in the garbage, ruined all of my hard work and I had not so choice words for the dog and Mike because as most know TJ is "Mike's" dog. I had to eat my mean thoughts becuase I felt terrible. I am still working on this. Hope to have actions match words/thoughts even when it is difficult.