Dear Me

I have seen this on a few other blogs lately and thought it might be fun. Here is a letter to my 20 year old self ...

Dear Becky Jo,

Yes, I used your middle name and no, you are not in trouble. In a few years you will prefer it this way. You will be completely over your "leave the southern roots behind" mentality and actually wish you had your accent back. Hard to believe, but oh, so true!

So, I am writing to you today to let you know that you ARE going to get married! I know that, at 20 years old, this is your biggest worry. You will also be a mom. In a few years you are gonna have some "issues" that will put that into question. It will be tough, I am telling ya now, but you WILL get through it. God will carry you through some pretty dark days, but on the other side of that darkness is life. Life and a man and a family. Just trust God when He tells you to do the unthinkable. It will seem to be the end of your dreams, but it will really just be a side road. And, girl, the view on that road will be so worth it.

You may have noticed that I said GOD would carry you. I even told you to listen to Him. I know right now you think you got that whole Christian thing goin' on, but you have not even scratched the surface. There will come a day when every choice you make will be prayed over first. You will take every fear, every joy and every moment to Him. I know right now that seems absurd, maybe even confining, but it will SET YOU FREE! You will love Him in ways you never imagined!

So, about this man. The one you will marry. Let me tell you here and now, it is NOT Doug. Part of me wants to tell you to not even go there, to run as far away from that as absolutely possible. But, there are lessons to learn there and you DO make it safely through (although one late summer night in particular, you will wonder.) Let me just warn ya, when driving home from the bowling alley, if you happen to notice that truck following behind you and the thought pops into your head to duck into a dark alley drive to lose him - DON'T DO IT! Stay on the well lit roadways and drive to a public place. Trust me, there is no one at home and you do NOT want to have that fight alone with him in the dark!

So, no, it is not Doug. And it will be a while before "he" comes along. A loooonnnngggg while. But, he is so worth the wait. He is everything you ever dreamed of. He is all of the prayers that you lifted up answered. He is a strong, caring, loving, wonderful man who will treat you like a princess and love you beyond your wildest expectations.

I really wish I could tell you who he is, but you will have to figure that out on your own. See, you will know him for a long time before you wake up and smell the Cherry Limeaide (yes, you will figure it out in a Sonic parking lot!!!). But it HAS to be that way because you are not ready yet and he is not exactly available when you first meet. But you WILL find your way to each other and your wedding will ROCK!!!!! You will proudly wear that white dress down that aisle - and don't blow it one cool night in a hot tub, it will be close that night .. too close!!! ;) - and the honeymoon will be everything you dreamed of. Who he is will surprise you at first, REALLY surprise you, but then you will look around and say to yourself "DUH!!!!!" and laugh.

And now I want to give you some advice about your life. I know you think all "old people" are stupid, but maybe you will listen to yourself...

**Stop calling yourself fat. You, in your size 6 jeans! And, take my advice, start working out now and do not stop ... it will be REALLY hard to get going later. And that whole pizza that you can eat all by yourself in one sitting ... run now before it catches up to ya!

**That little Hyundai Excell - I know ya hate it, but you are gonna have it for a while so, do yourself a favor ... CHANGE THE OIL EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE!!!

**Learn to handle your finances now ... you are gonna need it someday. REALLY need it!!!

**Your mom - she is smart. I know you don't think so now, but she is just about the smartest woman you will ever know. And she will be one of th ebest friends you will ever have.

**Your Grandparents - they are not gonna be around forever, love them hard while you can.

**NO! Face it, you DO NOT tan. You never have, you never will. And NO, that cooking oil and tin foil will NOT help. You will just get a really bad sunburn. Do me a favor and get some 100 SPF sunscreen. You are not gonna like dealing with the after effects of trying to get the all elusive tan! Trust me on this one!

**When a guy in your Spanish class asks you out on a date say yes (he's nice), but DO NOT let him pick you up at your house when all of your siblings are in town. They just might plaster every single face (including brothers and sisters in law, parents, nieces and nephews) in every single window of the house, putting the fear of all fears into the poor fella! (by the way, he is not the "one" either, but he is sweet)

**FYI - do not go on a first date to a double feature of Beaches and Steel Magnolias. Not only will you have a sever headache from all of the crying, but it will be the UGLY cry ... no second date there!

**When you want to buy a cute little VW Bug (and yes, you will. They will not always be goofy antiques), don't do it. That whole finances thing ... remember it! Although there will be a certain day when you have to call a certain gentleman to come and rescue you at the gas station when the gas tank won't open ... that night is worth it. Maybe you should go ahead and buy it. He turns out to be your knight in shining armor in MANY ways!

**That fancy white dress you want ... when the mayo gets smeared on the front of it and you think you're broke, TAKE IT TO THE CLEANERS ANYWAY!!!! If ya don't, that is just $99 down the drain... Mayo stains and the red dye does NOT work! PS - the dress really isn't all that great in the 1st place!!

**The perm you think you want ... just say NO!

**The trip to Hawaii ... step away from the Mai Tai's!

**That girl you think is your best friend ... watch the jewelry when she's around.

**Your little brother ... turns out, he is not so bad!

**Your older brother .. surprisingly, he isn't either.

**Your sisters and oldest brother ... visit them, make the effort to get to know them better!

**That diver's license pic that you think will be sexy and mysterious if you pout ... yeah, it won't!
**That little tiny wrinkle in the middle of your forehead - start putting the cream on it NOW!!!!! Otherwise it will become a CRATER!

**The Friends you will make the next few years, treasure them. You will lose a few of them and it will break your heart. Make the most of the time you have with them and tell them you love them.

**Get used to the fact that cancer sucks. You are gonna have to deal with that reality a LOT.

**I am gonna tell you this again... you WILL get married, you WILL be a mom and you WILL love it ... more than you can possibly even imagine now.

Enjoy your life, it is gonna be a good one!

And believe me when I say that God is gonna rock your world in the next few years. You will never look back and you will never be the same!

Love,
yourself in 20 years

PS - learn to love yourself now ... it will only get harder later!